Posts Tagged ‘Amtrak’

I’m going to tell everyone. If this train wrecks, I’m going to survive. I’m going to make campfires and eat meat- deer meat. So if you’re scared just go ahead and say it. We’re going to eat bald eagles too. Don’t be afraid to eat bald eagles.

Brief pause.

So I’m sitting on the Amtrak alone trying to think up some imaginary friends. Distracted. I think this guy has some marijuana. I could smell the odor when he walked by. Ziiiiiing. Here he comes. Wait a minute. He’s smoking a roach. He is smoking a ROACH! Knock it off. Go over there and sit down.

The bathroom is getting very occupied. Don’t worry about it. I will take care of it. No more people can use the bathroom. If you don’t like my decision, talk to the conductor. Talk to the conductor on this trip, that we have.


“Dude, I’m tired of listening to ya. Give it a rest.”

“Alright, give it a rest. You’re only tired of listening to me because I didn’t use any swear words. If I used swear words, you wouldn’t have been tired of listening to me.”

To himself. So now, I’m going to start using swear words. Now everything that comes out of my mouth is going to be a curse word. Curse words are the best because they piss everybody off. I’m pissed off, so you should be pissed off.

The twigster,


PS: This is a little glimpse into the people you meet on an overnight train from Sacramento, CA to Portland, OR. Keeps things interesting at least.


Oakridge, OR

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